Journal #133 – Concluded Psychological Evaluation

“Oh crap!”

That’s how I felt when I woke up this morning. It was 0928hrs and I have an appointment with my psychologist at 1030hrs.

So I went to with my morning routine and showered while my mom prepared a simple sandwich with slices of hard boiled egg and margarine. I rushed out of the house after packing my bag for work at around 1000hrs and ate my sandwich while making my way to the bus stop opposite my apartment block.

I made a mistake of not bothering to set my alarm clock to wake me up at around 0830hrs and left it at the original 0730hrs. So when the alarm did go off, and I intentionally left my phone on my desk, which is a walking distance from my bed, I walked over to switch off the alarm and went back to bed. I had thought I would wake up automatically at around 0830hrs, which would have given me enough time to prepare. Well, I’m not really a morning person unless I’m forced to or when I’m stressed out.

During the past two weeks, I dare say I made sufficient progress in evaluating what I want in my life, and what my goals and fears are. With that, I set a rule and shall constantly be reminding myself that whatever full-time job that I take on shall just be a means to an end. It is to secure necessary funds for me to do what I enjoy: writing.

After my session with the psychiatrist, I went for lunch at Ichiban Boshi at Jurong Point. Then I made my way to my client’s office. Instead of getting the usual Cold Brew, I went with Earl Grey. Why the change? Well, I tend to get acne outbreaks if I ate too much roasted, fried, or oily food. I know most scientific studies were not able to find a connection there but my body just behaves this way. Since coffee beans are mostly roasted, my face had a couple pimples.

At work today, I focus on bug fixing and enhancing one of the modules. Then at around 1640hrs, I went to get two curry puffs from Tip Top Curry Puff. Once I’m done with the puff, I went back to work. Did some testing of the bug fixes and enhancement before uploading the executable to the company’s FTP server.

I left the office at around 1830hrs, I left to a sea of crowd at Raffles Place station. There was a train signaling fault from Ang Mo Kio station to Marina South Pier station. That’s like practically half of the north-south train line. That meant that trains are moving extremely slowly between those stations.

However, I felt extremely pissed at SMRT for shutting down majority of the fare gates. I know that they are trying to control the amount of people waiting at the platforms for the north-south line but it inadvertently affect the people who are traveling on the east-west line. Making things worse is that some of the passengers have issues tapping their ez-link cards to go through the fare gates. One of the reasons why they have problem was that their cards were in their bags and they attempt to scan their card with their bag through approximation. That’s just plain fucking stupid. Is it so hard to take the card out and scan?

So by the time I went through the gate, I was already sweating heavily caused by the amount of heat generated by the large volume of people. If you are wondering why, I am highly sensitive to certain sounds, temperate, and crowds. So in a way, I’m suffering from over-stimulation. Over-stimulation raised my stress level, which led me to blame SMRT for their inability to manage the crowding situation.

Anyway, I reached home at around 1950hrs. Had a shower, and took some painkiller with muscle relaxant before eating dinner at around 2030hrs. The whole day I was feeling like crap. The left side of my body, especially the neck and shoulder area is extremely sore and painful. I had trouble turning or tiling my head to the right or down. I wasn’t sure why.

The painkiller didn’t help though and so I decided to paste on some medicated plaster to help ease the soreness. The medicated plaster did help but then the effect lasted only for a little bit. Now I need to deal with the pain.

After dinner, I went on to watch the last episode of Planet of the Apps and a couple of YouTube videos.

Special Mention

I also want to thank Mr. Yann Girard for letting me know about his book: 121 Unusual Tips to Being a Better Writer. I don’t get direct messages on Twitter unless it’s because I contacted the support team of a specific company for help or when they are my friends. So to me, it is a big deal and I really appreciate the personal touch. As for the book itself, I haven’t really start reading yet but I suppose it may help in my own writing.

One of his articles, From Employee to Entrepreneur in 10 steps, sounds just like a variation of what I am doing now. I admit that I’m fumbling about right now but I see it as necessary. The most important thing is the process of getting to the end goal and not the actual goal.

That’s all for now.

Here I conclude my journal for today.

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